Why Your Brain Likes to Worry — And How to Stop It

Imagine, for a moment, that you’re living in a hunter-gatherer society thousands of years ago.
You’re out gathering berries with a few others when you notice a small, fuzzy brown dot on the horizon. It could be a harmless rock, a patch of grass, or even a trick of the light. But your brain immediately jumps into action. You start to worry. Is it an animal? A predator? Could it be a lion waiting to pounce?
You decide to stay alert and cautious. Soon enough, the outline of the beast comes into focus as it moves closer. Thanks to your worry, you and your group have the chance to escape or prepare for the threat—surviving another day.
Now, imagine if you hadn’t worried. You might have brushed it off, assuming everything was fine—only to realize too late that it was, in fact, a lion. In ancient times, worry could mean the difference between life and death.
Fast forward to the present. While we no longer face lions or tigers in our daily lives, our brain’s tendency to worry remains. So why does your brain like to worry, and how can you stop it from taking control?

The Evolutionary Origins of Worry

As seen in the example above, worrying has an evolutionary purpose: survival. The human brain evolved to err on the side of caution, constantly scanning for potential threats. In the modern world, while our environment is far less physically life-threatening, we still face emotional, psychological, and societal stressors—such as challenges in relationships, work, finances, and health. These may not carry the same immediate risk as encountering a predator, but they still activate our brain’s ancient survival mechanisms.
Despite its intelligence, the brain doesn’t distinguish between a life-threatening event and an emotional or psychological one. A looming work deadline or an argument with a friend can trigger the same fight-or-flight response as a lion charging at you. In trying to “solve” these perceived threats, the brain fuels a cycle of what-ifs —creating anxiety and stress. We become trapped in imagined future scenarios, losing sight of the present.
So how do we break this cycle and manage worry more effectively?

Strategies to Manage Worry

1. Recognize the 'Playlist' in Your Mind

A powerful way to manage worry is to recognize that your mind is telling a story. When worry arises, it often takes the form of a narrative:
  • What if I lose my job?
  • What if my relationship falls apart?
  • What if something bad happens to my loved ones?
By acknowledging that your brain is creating a narrative (rather than predicting the future with certainty), you can take a step back from it.
Personally, I like to think of my worries as tracks on a playlist. When I catch myself spiralling, I remind myself, “Oh, the ‘Everything Is Going to Be Ruined’ playlist is playing again.” This small shift helps me create distance from my worries—sometimes even allowing me to laugh at them.

2. Try Grounding Exercises

When worry starts to take over, grounding techniques can help you stay present. One effective method is the
5-4-3-2-1 technique, which engages your senses to anchor you in the moment:
When worry starts to take over, grounding techniques can help you stay present. One effective method is the 5-4-3-2-1 technique, which engages your senses to anchor you in the moment:
  • 5 things you can see – Identify five objects in your surroundings (e.g., a lamp, a window, a tree).
  • 4 things you can touch – Notice four sensations, such as the texture of your clothing or the feeling of your feet on the floor.
  • 3 things you can hear – Listen for background sounds, like the hum of an air conditioner or birds chirping.
  • 2 things you can smell – Bring attention to any scents in the air.
  • 1 thing you can taste – Notice any lingering flavours in your mouth or the sensation of dryness.
By engaging your senses, you shift focus away from anxious thoughts and back to the present.

3. Practice Worry Postponement

Instead of letting worry consume your day, schedule a dedicated time for it. Set aside 30 minutes each evening as your “worry time.” When an anxious thought arises outside of that window, acknowledge it, jot it down, and tell yourself you’ll revisit it later.
During your designated worry period, reflect on the concerns you wrote down. More often than not, you’ll find that many of them no longer feel as urgent or distressing.

4. Cultivate Self-Compassion

Getting stuck in cycles of worry can be frustrating. In these moments, practicing self-compassion can be a powerful antidote. Dr. Kristin Neff’s Self-Compassion Break technique involves three steps:
  1. Acknowledge the difficulty – Silently say, “This is a moment of suffering.”
  2. Show kindness to yourself – Placing a hand over your heart can be a comforting gesture.
  3. Offer supportive words – Try saying, “May I be kind to myself as I navigate this.”
Many people resist self-compassion, fearing it might make them complacent. However, research shows that self-compassion actually enhances motivation and resilience more than self-criticism does (Breines & Chen, 2012).

Conclusion

By learning to manage worry, you can reclaim your peace of mind and approach life’s challenges with greater clarity. Just like our ancient ancestors, it’s about finding a balance—being aware of potential threats without allowing that awareness to spiral into unnecessary stress.

References

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Siew Choo Ting
Principal Psychologist